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#112439 - 01/06/10 12:13 AM One of my teammates
KoukiGS Offline
League Bowler

Registered: 01/05/10
Posts: 65
A/S/L: 22/M/CT
I bowl in 2 leagues. One of thursday and one on friday. The friday one is a very competitive league that I do every year. I'm doing the league on thursday because a friend of mine couldn't get any of our other friends to bowl with him. To the point now...

My friend has had a couple of knee surguries and is incapable of bending them for a slide without severe discomfort. As a result, he tends to loft the ball way down the lane and stands straight up. He still averages 185 though and is getting better and better everytime he bowls. On the league, I hear people on the other teams constantly laughing at him, making fun of how he bowls and everything. I take personal offense to it, because I know of his knee problems. I actually kind of use it as a personal drive to bowl out the house each and every night to prove a point. However, its getting to the point where it's really old hearing people every week. I almost feel compelled to put a shirt on my back that says stop laughing at my friend, he has knee problems and he will out bowl you. Has anyone else had to deal with something like this?
_________________________
HG: 300
HS: 836
Uses: C300 Full Swing, Pure Swing, Power Swing, Sharp Noize, White Dot (BLK/CAR/WHT) SST8 White.
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Avg-229 (Thur), 219 (Fri)

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Legend

Registered: Fri Aug 27 2004
Posts: 10100
A/S/L: Mountain View, CA
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#112441 - 01/06/10 12:52 AM Re: One of my teammates [Re: KoukiGS]
mtg712 Offline
Bracket Donor

Registered: 09/04/09
Posts: 157
A/S/L: 23/m/MI
no. ive never heard of this happening. we bowl with a guy 400+ pounds plus. hes a hell of a bowler but i never hear anyone say anything about him. i would definitely say something.
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Spring/Sum League Average: 183 wed morning Doubles
HG: 280
HS: 605
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#112444 - 01/06/10 12:58 AM Re: One of my teammates [Re: mtg712]
Domokun Offline
Virtual League Champion

Registered: 01/13/09
Posts: 898
A/S/L: male/DC Metro
"Hey ____, that's not cool. He's had multiple knee surgeries and can't bend to slide. Knock it off."

Barring that, you could give the jokers some knee problems with a tire iron from your car.
_________________________
HG: 300 | HS: 768

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#112446 - 01/06/10 01:11 AM Re: One of my teammates [Re: Domokun]
Atochabsh Offline
USBC Bronze Coach

Registered: 02/13/01
Posts: 6567
A/S/L: 50/F/California
Get a thicker skin. That's about all I can say. Does it bother you more then it does your friend? As long as he is not damaging the lanes and equipment then he can bowl as he wants. If the management has a problem with it, they will tell him.

And if you are absolutely driven to respond to these guys in your friend's defense that's as far as I'd take it...."talk to the management, because they have not said anything to us about how he bowls".

Erin

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#112452 - 01/06/10 01:37 AM Re: One of my teammates [Re: Atochabsh]
KoukiGS Offline
League Bowler

Registered: 01/05/10
Posts: 65
A/S/L: 22/M/CT
I'm a very humble bowler. I don't show emotion. I don't do crouch chops and I don't celebrate. I stand up, take my shot and sit back down. I don't make fun of how anyone else bowls, as with other sports, everyone has their own style of what works for them. Atcohabsh, you are probably right I do need to get thicker skin. It's tough for me to get through my head because of the way I am towards everything. I have not directly responded to anyone and have only let it reflect in the bowling. While for the first 13 weeks of league, that has worked fine, it's generally the same people I hear commenting everytime. He's not going to change his form, he can't, he's physically uncapable of doing so. I think that I take it so personally because he is a friend of mine and not just a bowling aquitance. I will take the advice of Domokon because going to management isn't how I deal with things. And when I say take his advice, I'm not referring to the tire iron part (though I do own a 4-way lol). I was more or less looking for a way to deal with it without making the problem worse or getting management involved.


Edited by KoukiGS (01/06/10 01:40 AM)
_________________________
HG: 300
HS: 836
Uses: C300 Full Swing, Pure Swing, Power Swing, Sharp Noize, White Dot (BLK/CAR/WHT) SST8 White.
League Secretary
Avg-229 (Thur), 219 (Fri)

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#112457 - 01/06/10 01:59 AM Re: One of my teammates [Re: KoukiGS]
Jay R. Offline
Legend

Registered: 05/03/08
Posts: 1300
A/S/L: 21/M/Tacoma, WA
Does he plant or does he still have a little slide? Just curious really. I wonder if he would consider bowling with his other hand so he could bend. Then again, it could still be uncomfortable using it as his power step too.

Good luck with the situation

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#112458 - 01/06/10 02:18 AM Re: One of my teammates [Re: Jay R.]
Atochabsh Offline
USBC Bronze Coach

Registered: 02/13/01
Posts: 6567
A/S/L: 50/F/California
And when they escalate due to someone else standing up for your friend what then?

Unless your friend has solicited your assistance in dealing with this "irritation" then I would just learn to ignore it. I'm sure your friend has been bowling like this for a long while and this is not the first group of critics he's seen. In fact if you do this without your friend's knowledge and agreement, you might embarass him.

Erin

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#112489 - 01/06/10 10:38 AM Re: One of my teammates [Re: Atochabsh]
Domokun Offline
Virtual League Champion

Registered: 01/13/09
Posts: 898
A/S/L: male/DC Metro
Erin makes absolute sense and truly, that's the way to go if this were really Adultopia, but it's not, and I know all too well that you will never be able to let it go. We're talking about your buddy, and you got his back. Don't take this as a slight against you, but it's more about you getting upset than how your friend feels--like Erin said, your buddy would've said something by now if he heard or cared about the jeering. So, better to get it calmly off your chest before one bad scene makes it explode from you.

Unless there's a lot of empty beer bottles on their table (or the guys are absolute dbags), they'd stop being as vocal if you politely and firmly confronted them--smile when you're doing it and keep the tire iron in your head.

Don't let 'em get a rise out of you, and the jeering'll probably go away. Or it'll just be out of earshot. Escalation's up to them, and if they do, then keep your hands up, smile on your face, and back off. Folks around you will take note of their dbaggery and will back you up.

Unfortunately, what Erin said at the end of her post is absolutely dead on...what you do is at the risk of his embarrassment so ya gotta weigh your options before acting.
_________________________
HG: 300 | HS: 768

Ebonite: Challenge, Exceed, Innovate
Storm/RG: Cell Pearl, Tropical Breeze

"Only NBC or CBS for me. New Ball Carry or Clean Ball Strikes. Channel 4 and 14 or nothing." -- D. Ryan

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#112511 - 01/06/10 01:06 PM Re: One of my teammates [Re: Domokun]
10PinGaloot Offline
Legend

Registered: 05/19/09
Posts: 2094
A/S/L: 65/m/ Woodburn, OR
My gosh! There was a bowler like that at my house 2 years ago. Knocks the heck out of the pins. I can't imagine laughing at anyone who is physically or mentally less well-equiped than me.

However, maybe your friend could develop a little comedy routine that he does with each opposing team prior to the game, to help them get adjusted to his differentness. I say comedy because nobody wants to hear about his medical woes, but everyone likes a person who doesn't take him/herself seriously.

Something like this - He throws a practice shot, turns around and says "Hey! Anybody got a spare knee? Mine doesn't seem to work." He throws his second practice shot and turns around and says "Wow! That baby was airborne!" Third shot, he turns around and says "I think I'm bending too much at the knees."

This breaks the ice, and then when folks on the other team ask you - or if they don't, you can offer - just tell them he's recovering from surgery and can't bend the knees. This all sets up for the game, at which time they should not be laughing at your friend but cheering him on!

A little personality goes a long way.

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"Dry lanes ain't worth a shot!"
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#112514 - 01/06/10 01:23 PM Re: One of my teammates [Re: 10PinGaloot]
J.Brown Offline
High Roller

Registered: 11/21/08
Posts: 368
A/S/L: 31/Ohio/USA
The guys doing the jeering probably don't know your friend can't bend his knee. I've never really heard anyone making fun of anyone else's bowling during league play though. If your friend is bothered by it or even know's ppl. are making fun of him your friend should be the one to say something or like said maybe he doesn't care smile

Spareme is right though some comedy would help break this ice. I bowled with a guy i worked with a few years ago. At work he had his hand disfigured. The machine cut his thumb and index finger off, cut half his middle and ring finger off. The hospital did a surgery and put his big toe where his thumb used to be and put what was left of his middle and ring finger together to make one finger. And yes this was the hand he bowled with, he always made jokes about his hand. Since his toe was on his hand he used to say "not bad for a guy that kicks the ball down the lane" lol.


Edited by J.Brown (01/06/10 01:24 PM)
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